teamhuerta

National Adoption Month

// November 6th, 2007 // Adoption

So, November is National Adoption Month here in the states and it turns out that I might have something to say on the subject.  The biggest challenge to being an adoptive family for us is that there are no “been there done that” people in our physical lives that we have a significantly close relationship to.  But just imagine this, it’s 1980 and you have just adopted a child from, let’s say, China.  Europe is still stressing from being in the middle of a “Cold War,” the Berlin Wall is still up.

Now you get home with your precious one and everyone oohs and awes and you pick up your big “corded” phone and burn up the phone lines explaining to your relatives and anyone you have a phone number in your rolodex for.  You have spent hours hearing from family about how they are so happy for you and how they could have never done “that,” (“that” being adopting, as if implying it is something more difficult to do than child bearing).

You scan the phone books for support groups, talk to local churches, and hope you meet someone else who has done “that” thing, and maybe you could share your stories and your hurts, your struggles and your joys.  But no luck, so you continue feeling somewhat “alone,” “different,” and “unique.”

Now fast forward to 2007… the web exists, and it has evolved to web 2.0.  The blogosphere has changed how we make connections and how we relate.  Although I must admit, having family that love us and our kids is awesome.  We still feel the pain of being pioneers.  Parenting isn’t new to any of our friends or family but parenting a 9 year old with little to no previous history is difficult.  Giving advice is always hard, accepting advice is just as difficult.  How did he deal as a 6 year old, what were his terrible 2′s like?  Was he a colicky baby?  At what age did he say his first word?  All questions, for the majority of people we know, that have a ready answer usually told with a laugh and an “Oh yeah, I remember that time when _____!”

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